How to Tell If You’re Actually in Love or Just Infatuated

Jana Warner

It’s easy to confuse love with infatuation, especially in the early stages of a relationship. When you’re constantly thinking about someone, excited to see them, and feeling butterflies every time they text, it can feel like love. But sometimes, these feelings are more about infatuation than lasting love.

Here’s how to tell the difference.

Infatuation vs. Love

Infatuation is often intense but short-lived. It’s that initial rush of excitement and attraction you feel when you first start dating someone.

Everything feels new and thrilling, and you can’t get enough of them. However, infatuation is often based on surface-level qualities, like physical attraction or the excitement of the chase, rather than deep emotional connection.

On the other hand, love takes time to develop. It’s built on trust, emotional intimacy, and genuine care for one another.

Love isn’t just about how someone makes you feel in the moment—it’s about wanting to support them, be there for them through challenges, and grow together.

Signs It’s Infatuation

  • You’re primarily focused on their looks or physical attraction.
  • You get a high from the idea of being with them, but aren’t interested in the more serious parts of their life.
  • The relationship feels like a fantasy, where you overlook flaws or red flags because you’re caught up in the excitement.

Signs It’s Love

  • You’re interested in their well-being, their goals, and their emotional state.
  • You’re comfortable around them, and the relationship feels supportive and safe, even when the excitement fades.
  • You’re willing to work through challenges together and can imagine a future with them, even when things aren’t perfect.

Understanding the difference between love and infatuation can help you figure out where you stand in your relationship and whether you’re ready to take things to the next level.