We’ve all heard of the infamous “friend zone”—a situation no one wants to find themselves in. But the truth is, the person you’re interested in might not feel the same way. In this article, we’ll explore signs that indicate someone isn’t interested in pursuing a romantic relationship.
Never Jealous
A surefire friend zone indicator is when they’re not jealous and even encourage your romantic pursuits elsewhere. This is especially true if they’re trying to set you up with someone they know. Think about it—would you want someone you’re interested in to be with someone else? No way.
Plans Are Casual
When plans together are always casual and lack any romantic effort, it’s likely a sign of a platonic relationship. It’s hard to believe that someone who thinks of you as a romantic partner would want to go to an all-you-can-eat buffet with you. Someone who wants to be with you romantically would like to opt for something a little more romantic or cozy.
No Physical Attraction
Verywell Mind says physical attraction isn’t everything in a relationship, but it is a very important aspect. Your romantic partner should be physically attracted to you; otherwise, there are bound to be problems with intimacy. You can usually tell how someone feels about your physical appearance through the compliments that they give you.
Constantly Talking About Others
There’s no more obvious sign that someone only thinks of you as a friend than talking to you about other people they want to date. If you’re unsure, consider asking them directly if they’re with that other person or if they’re still available to date someone else.
Always Available for Favors
When you’re always the go-to person for favors without reciprocity, it’s a clear sign of being in the friend zone. A good friend always wants to help you, but if someone only turns to you when they need something, you might be in the friend zone.
Conversation Stays Safe
Even though it’s very underrated, conversation is a key element of a successful relationship. Unlike other parts of the romance, this should be obvious even before you start dating. So if you’re only talking about the weather and politics, maybe this person isn’t the one for you. According to PinkVilla, romantic conversations should be deeper, flirtatious, and fun.
No Romantic Hints
The absence of romantic or flirty undertones in your interactions often means you’re viewed just as a friend. The way we treat our friends and our romantic partners is very different. We may love both of these types of people just as much as each other, but we show it off differently. Friendly taps on the shoulder can mean something more, but if there is nothing else, the person probably sees you as only a friend.
Third-wheel Feeling
Feeling like a third wheel, especially when they’re dating others, indicates friend-zone status. No person in their right mind would invite someone they’re interested in to hang around them while they’re with their romantic partner. Even if the person saw a future with you but was with someone else, they’d do their best to hide their relationship from you.
Always the Supportive Friend
If your role is primarily that of a supportive friend, especially during their hard times, romance is likely off the table. The good news is that if you’re always there for them, they might see that you would make such a great romantic partner. However, this doesn’t count if they need support for romantic issues.
No Special Treatment
Romantic partners hold a special place in our lives, which is why they are treated differently from others. If your crush treats you the same as they treat other people, they are likely not interested in you in the same way. For example, if they told you about something at the same time as others, then you’re clearly on the same level as well.
They Set You Up with Others
Another tell-tale sign that someone thinks of you as a friend is that they’ll try to set you up with others. They might even cheer you on to keep on dating so you can find your passion. If you’re in this position and are not ready to tell them how you feel, decline the dates and maybe tell them that there’s someone who has caught your eye.
No Private Time
If your crush is interested in you, they would like to try to spend some alone time with you. So if they prefer to only hang out with you in a group setting or during group activities, they might not see you in that way.
Unconcerned with Impressions
Someone’s lack of effort to impress you or look their best can show you’re seen more as a friend than a potential partner. Think about it. Have you ever been relaxed around someone you liked? Probably not. The Gentleman’s Journal says, “Honestly, even the most low-maintenance of girls wouldn’t let someone she was interested in [see] her [in gym attire and without makeup] before you were at least… out of the friend zone.”
Always Assumes Platonic Intent
You might be bringing your best efforts to try and woo this person, but all they see is a friend who is doing them favors. They probably think your gifts are romantic gestures and miss all your flirting. This is why it pays to be direct.
They’re Too Comfortable
Extreme comfort to the point of sharing unromantic or personal details often means they view you as just a friend. In the early stages of a relationship, we all try to make our best impressions. You might have heard that some girls wouldn’t order messy food like burgers on first dates, and it’s for this reason.
Physical Contact Is Functional
The way we touch our friends and family is so different from the way we touch romantic partners. At the very least, a romantic interest should try to seek some meaningful physical contact with you. If they don’t linger or seek you out, they’re likely not interested.
You’re Like Family
Some people describe you as family or friends. OK Cupid says this likely means that they see you that way and aren’t seeking to have a romantic connection with you. Such relationships can grow into romantic relationships, but it’s not a reliable way to start something with someone.
They Don’t Notice Your Advances
If your romantic advances go unnoticed or are misunderstood, you’re likely stuck in the friend zone. Be careful when making romantic advances, as they can be taken the wrong way. It’s best to clearly state your intentions to the other person to prevent misunderstandings.